So I wanted to write a post about what school life was like for me as a child. I know I mentioned it briefly in my other post, so I just wanted to elaborate ;)
***I'm warning you! this post may be long.. but stick with it, it makes sense***
So to start I wanted to talk about struggles. I struggled with many things at school. My home life wasn't very nice.. and prevented me from giving all my attention. I got into trouble on a regular basis.. for forgetting books, failing to hand in homework, not buying equipment, turning up late.. the list goes on. Now, I know that you're thinking.. typical naughty child.. right?? Far from it. I know that all the teachers were thinking the same thing! (I have since been in contact with my teachers, and my fears were confirmed.. yet something surprised me!... we'll get to that later on!)
I wasn't trying to be naughty.. and I genuinely wanted to learn! My parents didn't have any money.. so buying equipment just wasn't an option. I did get SOME help from the school.. but knowing I needed every single book, school trip, uniform.. and so on, I simply gave up asking the school for help. It was easier for me to act up and pretend I wasn't interested.. than to ask my poor mum constantly for money she so desperately wanted to give.. but couldn't.
I was never able to hand in any of my work.. because I never had time to actually do it. I know that sounds like a lazy excuse, but I wish that was all it was. I found that some of my teachers didn't support me in this at all.. I tried to tell my stories but they were classed as another excuse. Some of my teachers I think had caught on.. and I'll never forget how much they helped me.
I will always remember one school trip that I missed out on.. and it hit hard when I wasn't able to go. History was always the worst subject for me (Along with maths). My teacher was sick of me not paying attention.. and not completing my work at home.. that she sent me out almost every lesson.. even if I had nothing to do with the situation. I knew she was angry with me and told me almost every day that I wouldn't go anywhere in life if I didn't take school seriously. Little did she know deep down I was hurting so much. Of course I wanted to learn! Of course I wanted to do my work.. I just couldn't. Anyway, I remember a trip in history to Germany.. something to do with visiting all the trenches and everything. World war 1 and 2 always interested me.. and a trip there with a bunch of my friends would have been amazing. My heart sank because I knew I couldn't ask my mum.. and I knew that the school could only provide a small percentage of the trip allowance. So.. I never asked.. I threw the letter away.. and I never mentioned it. All my friends were talking about it.. and how they were sharing a room. I heard the same comments constantly "Rosie go!", "Rosie can I share a room with you??", "Ask your mum again!". I cant describe the pain. But it hurt.
As a child I was extremely stubborn.. and always aware of the difference between wrong and right. I knew that I had to stand up for myself.. and others id I was needed. There were several occasions when I first started and I was bullied for having too many spots, for not having new clothes, and for sticking up for those more timid than me. It made me stronger.. perhaps too feisty for my own good. I got into a few scraps at school.. and made me stand my ground. I joined a bullying group at school and became a senator. A senator was somebody who went to regular meetings about bullying and put forward any ideas on how to stop it. I was also a counsellor.. and it helped me get through my own struggles. I felt proud to be able to stand there putting on a brave face and helping others.
School for me was my retreat.. and somewhere I could actually be myself and not have to worry about what waited for me at home. Sometimes the teachers made it so difficult.
Here's a message to any teachers out there who don't understand.. I hope this changes the way you think
TEACHERS
The kid that plays up in class.. might not be a naughty child. Just completely misunderstood. Don't shout at them, punish them, call them naughty, lazy.. or tell them that they will go nowhere in life. I had dreams of becoming so many things.. but its amazing how one comment from a teacher can crush you at such a young age.
Try to understand WHY and try and HELP them succeed like everybody else!
Not every child who turns up late is careless. I turned up late most days.. but I had been up all night with no sleep.. so turning up on time was almost impossible. Being up all night with an abusive "dad" and having to go into school and receive lectures and punishment for turning late on top of that is so hard.
ASK them why.. and support them. Something I needed so desperately.
The kid who falls asleep in class and doesn't engage with other students. Don't scold them.. find the reason behind it!
There will be students who can't afford to buy the equipment.. or go on school trips. Don't tell them to constantly ask their parents, don't tell them they need to be more organised, more responsible. Its not as easy as that! Find out what you can do to help them achieve. don't knock them whilst they're down.
Parent's evening. Don't constantly tell the parents how bad your student is, how disruptive they are, how they are always late. Don't tell the parents how your child never has equipment, how they never attend school trips. Don't ask the parents if they have received any of the letters they have give to the student. THINK about the consequences for the student. I always dreaded parents evening. Yes, I might come across naughty.. but I was trying to protect my mother. Now my mum is asking why I never told her about school trips.. and I know my mum was so upset. I never wanted her to feel responsible for me missing out.. she had enough troubles of her own. The teachers at school spoke to her like she didn't care.. and like I didn't care. It's not easy for a parent and a child going through so much.. to hear that you're basically failing as a parent too. (which she wasn't by the way).
So my message to the teachers.. is basically this. Don't treat your students with disrespect when you think you know why they act the way they do. Look deeper in why it might be happening and please, please help them :(
I know this is a sad post. But its SO important to get this message across!!
Would love to hear your views :)
Thanksss
Rosie xx
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